Perhaps, like many of you, I've held tightly to my beliefs and opinions, only to be confronted by entirely different viewpoints that seemed to make equal sense. Invariably, this state of affairs has made me uneasy, and in my pursuit of intellectual honesty, I've gotten myself "wrapped around the axle" more often than I can count.
Psychologists have coined a term for this experience. They call it cognitive dissonance and describe it (at least according to Wikipedia) as the mental stress or discomfort experienced by an individual who holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values at the same time; performs an action that is contradictory to one or more beliefs, ideas, or values; or is confronted by new information that conflicts with existing beliefs, ideas, or values. Not too many years ago, this unsettling experience went by a term that was generally and instinctively understood, but now has fallen into general disuse – the word, conscience.
My own cognitive dissonance has been especially acute in the realm of politics. But honoring my pledge not to wade into political waters on my blog, I'll talk about another example - the cognitive dissonance that comes with racism. As a child, I grew up respecting my parents and, by extension, all adult authority. As such, adults in charge could do no wrong. But that view was first seriously challenged when I was nine years old. As my parents and I were driving to New Orleans, where my dad would be attending a convention, we made a gasoline and restroom stop somewhere in East Texas. Stepping out of the car, I immediately headed for the restroom, which was marked ""Whites Only". There was no other restroom for men. The first thing that popped out of my mouth was "Dad, where do boys that aren't white go?" The answer was buried in his silence, and I was instantly both angered, confused, and profoundly disappointed by how adults could be so unfair. The side-by-side "Whites Only" and "Colored Only" drinking fountains didn't help matters. Later in life I became fascinated with everything connected with the American Civil War, primarily because of the national cognitive dissonance created by the coexistence of the institution of slavery and the concept of all men being created equal.
I've always been a person who tries to get along and not make waves. I've craved acceptance by every group I've been a part of. But the inevitable result has been almost unbearable cognitive dissonance. The answer I found is not in a set of rules, a code of ethics, a personal agenda, or a party platform, but in the person of Christ. Just like he did when he encountered people over 2,000 years ago, he continues to challenge me to peel the onion and find the core motivation for every opinion I hold about every subject that really matters. Only then am I able to know whether my opinion is based on selfishness or loving concern for others. And only then am I able to hold my opinion confidently and boldly state it without cognitive dissonance.
Psychologists have coined a term for this experience. They call it cognitive dissonance and describe it (at least according to Wikipedia) as the mental stress or discomfort experienced by an individual who holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values at the same time; performs an action that is contradictory to one or more beliefs, ideas, or values; or is confronted by new information that conflicts with existing beliefs, ideas, or values. Not too many years ago, this unsettling experience went by a term that was generally and instinctively understood, but now has fallen into general disuse – the word, conscience.
My own cognitive dissonance has been especially acute in the realm of politics. But honoring my pledge not to wade into political waters on my blog, I'll talk about another example - the cognitive dissonance that comes with racism. As a child, I grew up respecting my parents and, by extension, all adult authority. As such, adults in charge could do no wrong. But that view was first seriously challenged when I was nine years old. As my parents and I were driving to New Orleans, where my dad would be attending a convention, we made a gasoline and restroom stop somewhere in East Texas. Stepping out of the car, I immediately headed for the restroom, which was marked ""Whites Only". There was no other restroom for men. The first thing that popped out of my mouth was "Dad, where do boys that aren't white go?" The answer was buried in his silence, and I was instantly both angered, confused, and profoundly disappointed by how adults could be so unfair. The side-by-side "Whites Only" and "Colored Only" drinking fountains didn't help matters. Later in life I became fascinated with everything connected with the American Civil War, primarily because of the national cognitive dissonance created by the coexistence of the institution of slavery and the concept of all men being created equal.
I've always been a person who tries to get along and not make waves. I've craved acceptance by every group I've been a part of. But the inevitable result has been almost unbearable cognitive dissonance. The answer I found is not in a set of rules, a code of ethics, a personal agenda, or a party platform, but in the person of Christ. Just like he did when he encountered people over 2,000 years ago, he continues to challenge me to peel the onion and find the core motivation for every opinion I hold about every subject that really matters. Only then am I able to know whether my opinion is based on selfishness or loving concern for others. And only then am I able to hold my opinion confidently and boldly state it without cognitive dissonance.
David, I hope this is not your last blog. I pray about you, Charliss too, every morning when I walk. Your wisdom in the face of suffering has blessed me. Facing our mortality is difficult. Your observations help to point the way in faith. Love, Marquita
ReplyDeleteThank you Marquita. Just by reading and commenting you give me an opportunity to be part of a conversation, and that means a great deal to me. As I wrote this posting, which won't be my last, I was reminded of Joseph's words at Gary's memorial about how Gary loved to engage his family in discussions of weighty issues, challenging them to think outside the box (pun intended). And then I remembered how he did this very thing with Greg and other students at BCS, helping them develop critical thinking skills that have served them well in their lives. What a legacy!
DeleteDavid, this is so reminiscent of my own experience. I grew up in the heart of segregation near Gladewater in East Texas. When I was about 5 years old a black man came to my house selling rose bushes. Mother told me to go see what he had and tell him we did not want any. Then she heard me say "No, Sir, to him. When I came back in I was heartily scolded for saying "Yes, Sir" to a black man. That was true dissonance for me. I had been told to say, "Yes, Sir" and "No, Sir" to adults. This man was obviously and adult. The only difference in him and me as far as I could see was that his skin was almost black. I sat and I thought and thought, and all I could think was that was the stupidest thing I had ever heard of. I made up my mind right then: that rule made no sense and I would not follow it. It formed a strength in me that is there to this day. Later, I believe I helped my mother see the light also.
DeleteThanks Martha, Learning from the past, my challenge today is to hear and act on the cognitive dissonance that I've created in my own life - the log in my own eye I can't see.
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